Login
Email address

Password
Register | Forgotten password?
Illustration for Today

not-sure-about - medium

It’s not always easy to change the way you parent your children but knowing that small things could be altered is the first step. In the long run, making changes to your style of parenting, will make life much easier for you and, more importantly, produce happy, confident children. Download Book 1, ‘Being a Parent’ FREE right now!

Read more…

Follow Us on Twitter

PostHeaderIcon Strong-Willed Two-Year Old. Help!

My two-year old daughter is becoming increasingly demanding and strong-willed. I don’t seem to be able to move without her either screaming or hanging onto me all the time. It’s as if she just wants her own way all the time. It’s incredibly frustrating as I can’t get anything done and sometimes I find I’m so tired I lose my temper and shout at her, which I’m always sorry for afterwards.

Have you any suggestions on how to get through this ‘terrible two’s’ phase any easier?

Sandra, Epping, UK

Supernanny’s reply:

Children learn about attachment to their mother, or primary care-giver, at an early age but if for any reason this attachment isn’t secure, such as the child or yourself may have spent some time in hospital, the child can become quite anxious when you leave her or are out of her sight.

While you may find her behaviour a sign of her developing a strong will and ‘trying to get her own way’, she genuinely does feel as if she’s being left alone.

The one thing children of all ages require is attention. If they can’t get good attention, they’ll behave in such a way as to get any attention, good or bad. Pushing her away and getting angry will only make the situation worse.

I would suggest spending as much time with her as possible over the next few days, playing or reading with her and ensuring that you let her know if you have to go into another room so that she is aware and can come with you. At the same time, if you can start to accept and acknowledge her feelings (see Book 2 ‘Feelings’) and speak to her openly and congruently about what you have to do, you will find she will quickly be a happier child. A child’s natural state is happiness and within a week of giving her lots of good attention, you should find a significant change.

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.

Search
FAQs
How soon can I start the program?
Answer
Testimonials

“Simple, straightforward, well-structured and very useful. I feel quite inspired to get a group of friends together to practise these skills on a weekly basis.”

– W.M. Larne

Featured Book
Cover11 - medium
Cover11 - large
There comes a time when we do have to deal with unwanted behaviour without blaming and shaming. Book 11 gives step-by-step guidance to using the ‘4-part I challenge’ which encourages the desired change from your child without resorting to attack and blame.
When we challenge unacceptable behaviour, we want to do it while remaining friends with our children. Encouraging high self-esteem in our children should always be at the fore-front of any action we take, therefore despite pointing out behaviour we don’t like; we still want them to feel good about themselves.

There are four steps to encouraging co-operation; describe the offending behaviour, state the effect it has on you, tell them how you feel about that effect on you and ask them to help you with solving the problem.

When you behave congruently, your children will learn to do the same; it’s all in the style of communication. Book 11 also explores the hypnotic effect of language.

Book 11 – Challenging
Recommended Links
Find us on Facebook
 Copyright Parenting Skills Online 2018 - All Rights Reserved Site by Webspeed