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In some cases parents make a conscious decision to bring their children up differently from the way in which they were raised. Rather than being an aggressive or a submissive parent, Parenting Skills Online advocates being an assertive parent. Book 9 tells you how but you can get started right away and download Book 1, ‘Being a Parent’ FREE!

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What we are not told when our babies arrive is that the greater part of our child’s learning is done unconsciously as a small child, and most of it up to the age of seven, called the imprint period. Information at an extensive rate of 5 billion synaptic connections per day is downloaded into a small child’s unconscious mind.
As parents we are the primary source of a child’s conscious and unconscious learnings and it is this fact which makes it all the more important in how we interact with our children during these formative years.

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The last book in the series looks at styles of parenting and the effectiveness of each. It also looks at possible causes when the 4-part I challenge doesn’t work. We bring in the ‘soft no’, which is another alternative.
What are the possible causes of the ‘4-part I challenge’ not being effective? This particular skill may not work if it was your problem and not the child’s or if you were not being congruent. If you behave aggressively rather than assertively you may not get the desired result either.

When all else fails, you can save energy with the ‘soft no’. This skill can be used when you really don’t want to negotiate and you just want them to do as you ask. This can be used in potentially dangerous situations or when you’re just too tired to be bothered.

Finally, we conclude with reaching agreements with your children and then making sure they stick to them. This could be regarding simple issues such as leaving lights on, to more serious things like coming home later than agreed.

Book 12 – Being Firm and Gentle
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